I'm genuinely surprised it's been over a year since I last wrote a post! So naturally I don't know where to start. I suppose it'll be a life update. Since I last posted (June 2021), I became homeless. I still am, technically, but after 9 months in a council hostel I'm finally in a 1… Continue reading (Another) Life Update
Tag: mental health
Life Update
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZQzrqc9Uk8&ab_channel=HomeworkRadio What's new: I'm seeing someone, kindaI'm tired almost all the time (see below)I most likely have coeliac diseaseI'm about halfway through finishing my debut EP and first project as philomenahI broke up with my therapistI'm considering switching anti-depressants About the guy I'm seeing: he's not perfect. But he is lovely. Some things about him… Continue reading Life Update
Dating With Depression?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTDHobyS_DQ&ab_channel=HomeworkRadio Today I want to discuss the idea that you should wait until you're in a "good place" before you enter into relationship with someone else, and the degree to which this is an ableist perspective in the context of mental illness. https://i.pinimg.com/originals/d6/13/2b/d6132b67bed66308b8b5d40206996799.gif I'm fairly happy being single at the moment. I feel as if… Continue reading Dating With Depression?
Dating + Accountability
Instead of always focusing on why the men I attract cannot meet my needs, today I am going to hold my hands up and admit that I attract emotionally unavailable people and explore why. I listened to a podcast the other day with Mark Groves and Damona Hoffman. Damona is a dating coach and specialises… Continue reading Dating + Accountability
Three Weeks On Sertraline
Trigger warning: suicidal ideation and self-injury It's been over three weeks now since I started taking sertraline, an SSRI anti-depressant. Also known as Zoloft and Lustral amongst other things. In my last blog post, I ran over the initial side effects and how it felt during the adjustment period. Now I feel as if those… Continue reading Three Weeks On Sertraline
First Week On Sertraline
I've written fairly extensively about my qualms about anti-depressive treatment. I won't go into depth now but I've written about it here and here. Not so long ago, I was feeling particularly resistant about taking them; maybe partly because my depressive illness had gotten so bad that I knew I might have to. But for… Continue reading First Week On Sertraline
Thoughts On…Refusing Medication
Trigger warning: suicidal ideation. * * * I've wanted to leave this earth forever countless times. I first wrote a song about it at age 15. How unoriginally "angsty" of me. What are teenagers like, eh? Not a care in the world yet somehow still finding something to whinge about. Human despair is a strange… Continue reading Thoughts On…Refusing Medication
The Detrimental Impact of Toxic Shame
Trigger warning: self-harm and suicidal ideation * * * Alyse Parker, a YouTuber and life coach I follow, said in one of her recent videos that we are the average of the 5 people we spend the most time with. That was definitely a thought-provoker for me. Because I spend a lot of my time… Continue reading The Detrimental Impact of Toxic Shame
The Nuance of Depression + Recovery
In my last post, I discussed briefly the role of free will in the context of mental illness. It's such a colossal subject with so much scope to cover that of course I only scratched the surface. Today, I want to go into slightly more depth with this as my prompt: In the comment section… Continue reading The Nuance of Depression + Recovery
Embracing Darkness With The Buddha Of The North
For a few weeks, I've been mulling over which Buddhist figure should be the centrepiece of my shrine. I initially thought of Green Tara - the Buddha of compassion - who has been a familiar figure for me my whole life. Growing up, my Dad had a small Green Tara tapestry hanging in our home,… Continue reading Embracing Darkness With The Buddha Of The North
philomenah's safe space 
