Trigger warning: suicidal ideation. * * * I've wanted to leave this earth forever countless times. I first wrote a song about it at age 15. How unoriginally "angsty" of me. What are teenagers like, eh? Not a care in the world yet somehow still finding something to whinge about. Human despair is a strange… Continue reading Thoughts On…Refusing Medication
Category: Thoughts On…
Desire Is Not Respect: Attraction + Trauma Bonding
Something that's changed for me significantly in the past few years is the way I approach attraction and romantic interest. This is quite encouraging for me because experiencing frequent bouts of depression sometimes makes me feel that everything is stagnant and that there's no point to anything; so it's really nice to feel like despite… Continue reading Desire Is Not Respect: Attraction + Trauma Bonding
Thoughts On…The Scrutiny Of Women
* * * "Your legs are are getting astronomically long!" my Dad exclaimed one day, surveying my body. "In fact, your thighs are about 4 inches longer than what they should be." I laughed, taking this as a compliment. This was the usual - if it was a joke, then I couldn't rightfully be hurt… Continue reading Thoughts On…The Scrutiny Of Women
Mental Illness + Free Will
I wrote a post about free will as it pertains to abuse a little while ago. The concept of free will interests me on a philosophical and psychological level because I think it's so nuanced. The main question it boils down to are the statements: you can't help it or you can help it. You can't help sleeping all… Continue reading Mental Illness + Free Will
Selfies + “Pick Me” Culture
As a general rule, people try to make themselves look appealing in selfies - that kinda goes without saying. Dr. Jenn Hardy, a psychologist on Instagram, has a post encouraging people to take more pictures of themselves. Her reasoning is that lots of people regret not documenting their lives more visually as they get older.… Continue reading Selfies + “Pick Me” Culture
Festive Dread
This post is for anyone who feels somewhat at a loss within the festive period. For the past few years, I've approached the festive period with a low-level anxiety and existential dread: "What should I be doing? The thing it is that I'm supposed to be doing simply doesn't feel like an option for me. What… Continue reading Festive Dread
More Thoughts On… Boundaries + Codependency
Yeah, this is definitely not the first time I've written about this but you know what - a bitch got stuff to say so I'm exploring it again. Codependency has been playing on my mind the past few weeks partly because of the kind of content I've been consuming lately. I've recently had a brilliant… Continue reading More Thoughts On… Boundaries + Codependency
Thoughts On… Social Media + What I Don’t Like About Blogging
Part of what drives my passion for blogging (and songwriting, actually) is a striving towards vulnerability. This is because so much of what is prevalent in the media at the moment is contrived and emotionless. And I would like to see more people taking an openhearted and radically honest approach to content creation and self-expression.… Continue reading Thoughts On… Social Media + What I Don’t Like About Blogging
The Problem With “Getting Better”…
...is that it implies there is something "wrong" with you in the first place. I've had a shift in perspective recently when it comes to self help, mental illness and shadow work. It's not something that always made sense to me, that truly bringing about positive change starts with radical acceptance of where we are… Continue reading The Problem With “Getting Better”…
Thoughts On…The First Week Without Therapy
I was going to publish a post today that I wrote earlier about the concept of "getting better" and how that can be problematic in itself; but it doesn't feel true to how I feel right now. I don't feel like I have any supposed "truth bombs" I can drop and feel self-satisfied about right… Continue reading Thoughts On…The First Week Without Therapy
philomenah's safe space 