https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTDHobyS_DQ&ab_channel=HomeworkRadio Today I want to discuss the idea that you should wait until you're in a "good place" before you enter into relationship with someone else, and the degree to which this is an ableist perspective in the context of mental illness. https://i.pinimg.com/originals/d6/13/2b/d6132b67bed66308b8b5d40206996799.gif I'm fairly happy being single at the moment. I feel as if… Continue reading Dating With Depression?
A Reintroduction
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJew8Mvgau0&ab_channel=HomeworkRadio Not sure how to begin this blog post but I now go under the handle of ph!lomenah! This blog used to be called SMUT. and Self Esteem and it's now ph!lomenah's safe space. My stage name as a musician used to be SMUT. and now it's...you get the gist. I decided it fairly spontaneously… Continue reading A Reintroduction
Dating + Accountability
Instead of always focusing on why the men I attract cannot meet my needs, today I am going to hold my hands up and admit that I attract emotionally unavailable people and explore why. I listened to a podcast the other day with Mark Groves and Damona Hoffman. Damona is a dating coach and specialises… Continue reading Dating + Accountability
Conscious Avoidance
At work this week, the topic of relationships came up and I mentioned to a colleague that I wanted to stay single for 2 years. One pharmacist I was working with overheard me and seemed aghast, gasping: "That's so sad!" "Not as sad as being a relationship that makes you miserable," I replied, defending my… Continue reading Conscious Avoidance
Three Weeks On Sertraline
Trigger warning: suicidal ideation and self-injury It's been over three weeks now since I started taking sertraline, an SSRI anti-depressant. Also known as Zoloft and Lustral amongst other things. In my last blog post, I ran over the initial side effects and how it felt during the adjustment period. Now I feel as if those… Continue reading Three Weeks On Sertraline
First Week On Sertraline
I've written fairly extensively about my qualms about anti-depressive treatment. I won't go into depth now but I've written about it here and here. Not so long ago, I was feeling particularly resistant about taking them; maybe partly because my depressive illness had gotten so bad that I knew I might have to. But for… Continue reading First Week On Sertraline
So Filled With Beauty, So Filled With Pain
The past couple of days I have felt very open to emotional experience and very willing to love. I worked in a very hectic pharmacy yesterday, and with a pharmacist who had a somewhat bad reputation within the company. She was obsessive, eccentric, intellectually-preocuppied, highly methodical and certainly neurotic. But she was also intensely likeable.… Continue reading So Filled With Beauty, So Filled With Pain
Thoughts On…Refusing Medication
Trigger warning: suicidal ideation. * * * I've wanted to leave this earth forever countless times. I first wrote a song about it at age 15. How unoriginally "angsty" of me. What are teenagers like, eh? Not a care in the world yet somehow still finding something to whinge about. Human despair is a strange… Continue reading Thoughts On…Refusing Medication
The Detrimental Impact of Toxic Shame
Trigger warning: self-harm and suicidal ideation * * * Alyse Parker, a YouTuber and life coach I follow, said in one of her recent videos that we are the average of the 5 people we spend the most time with. That was definitely a thought-provoker for me. Because I spend a lot of my time… Continue reading The Detrimental Impact of Toxic Shame
Shadow Work + God-Consciousness
Something I've been struggling with a lot lately is social media. And just my phone in general. I'm finding it veeeeery difficult to limit my usage and I feel like my third eye is so clouded at the moment. Round about the new moon in Cancer a few weeks ago, I did have a very… Continue reading Shadow Work + God-Consciousness
